Let's have a laugh

papgeno replied on 15/05/2020 13:07

Posted on 15/05/2020 13:07

There was a letter in the paper yesterday from a chap who said that he was observing a lockdown rule in relation to drinking .

He was complying with the "one drink a day" rule. He was currently up to the 30th June 2033.

Takethedogalong replied on 15/05/2020 15:27

Posted on 15/05/2020 15:27

Yorkshire farmer is out checking his stock in fields, see’s a strange elderly man with a long white beard striding across one pasture. Asks “who are you then?” Reply “it’s only me, God, working from home”

😁

papgeno replied on 22/05/2020 14:42

Posted on 22/05/2020 14:42

Saw this on Faceache

I found a twenty pound note outside Morrisons this morning and didn't know what I should do. So I thought what would Jesus do and I turned into wine.

redface replied on 14/08/2020 20:03

Posted on 14/08/2020 20:03

I met my old mate Hugh in the pub last night. He told me there is a new easy test for Covid-19. Take a glass of Gin and see if you can smell it. If you can, you are halfway there. Then drink it and if you can taste it then, as Covid severely impairs your sense of smell and taste, it is reasonable to assume you are free of the virus.

Hugh and I tested each other nine times last night and we were virus free every time, thank goodness! I will have to test myself again today however, as I have a bit of a headache, which can also be one of the symptoms...

Enjoy your testing for the virus!

redface replied on 14/08/2020 20:04

Posted on 14/08/2020 20:04

I met my old mate Hugh in the pub last night. He told me there is a new easy test for Covid-19. Take a glass of Gin and see if you can smell it. If you can, you are halfway there. Then drink it and if you can taste it then, as Covid severely impairs your sense of smell and taste, it is reasonable to assume you are free of the virus.

Hugh and I tested each other nine times last night and we were virus free every time, thank goodness! I will have to test myself again today however, as I have a bit of a headache, which can also be one of the symptoms...

Enjoy your testing for the virus!

papgeno replied on 19/08/2020 14:40

Posted on 19/08/2020 14:40

A bloke in Yorkshire saw an job advert for an assistant in a bikini waxing parlour. He read the job description which said it entailed helping the clients to disrobe, preparing them for the procedure and rubbing in the soothing lotion afterwards.

He rang the number and said he'd like to apply. The person on the other end of the phone said he'd have to go to Cornwall. He asked is that where the job was.  No came the reply that's where the end of the queue is.