Neck wear

cyberyacht replied on 10/10/2018 11:16

cyberyacht

Posted on 10/10/2018 11:16

Given CAMCs reputation for being stuffy, I thought this joke might strike a chord.
A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance.
Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis only to find a British soldier selling regimental ties.
The Taliban asked, "Do you have water?" The soldier replied, "There is no water, the well is dry. Would you like to buy a tie instead? They are only £10
The Taliban shouted, "You idiot infidel! I do not need an over-priced tie. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!"
"OK," said the soldier, "It does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that, and that I am a much better human being than you. If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find our Sergeant's Mess. It has all the ice cold water you need.
Cursing him, the Taliban staggered away over the hill.
Several hours later he staggered back, collapsed with dehydration & rasped, " They won't let me in without a flaming tie!”

6 people like this

4 replies

redface replied on 30/10/2018 20:44

redface

Caravanner from Kent

Posted on 30/10/2018 20:44

It had been snowing all night …………..

08:00 - I made a snowman.

08:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

08:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

08:17 - My feminist neighbour complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

08:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

08:22 - The transgender ma..wom...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

08:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

08:28 - I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

08:31 - The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wear a burka

08:40 - The Police arrive saying someone has been offended.

08:42 - The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

08:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

08:45 - TV news crew from ABC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

09:00 - I'm on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

09:10 - I am asked if I have any accomplices. My children are taken by social services.

09:29 - Far left protesters, who are offended by everything, are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded.

Moral: There is no moral to this story. It's just the world in which we live today, and it’s going to get much worse.

5 people like this

replied on 08/11/2018 08:09

Posted on 08/11/2018 08:09

The user and all related content has been Deleted User

mickysf replied on 08/11/2018 12:53

Member

mickysf

Motorhomer from South Humberside

Posted on 30/10/2018 20:44 by redface

It had been snowing all night …………..

08:00 - I made a snowman.

08:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

08:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

08:17 - My feminist neighbour complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

08:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

08:22 - The transgender ma..wom...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

08:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

08:28 - I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

08:31 - The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wear a burka

08:40 - The Police arrive saying someone has been offended.

08:42 - The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

08:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

08:45 - TV news crew from ABC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

09:00 - I'm on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

09:10 - I am asked if I have any accomplices. My children are taken by social services.

09:29 - Far left protesters, who are offended by everything, are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded.

Moral: There is no moral to this story. It's just the world in which we live today, and it’s going to get much worse.